Putting Yourself First

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As you’ve likely experienced, parenting is most often a “do as I do” job and very rarely “do as I say.” Our children watch us and learn how to interact with their environment by how we interact with ours. So along with our quirky mannerisms and (just a few) slipped “bad words,” we also pass on to them how, or how not, to take care of themselves. If you are consistently putting yourself last, stretching yourself to take care of everyone else, this is what you are ultimately teaching your children to do, too. You are teaching them that the value of you as an individual is not as important as the value of other individuals. Read More…

 

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More Effective Than a Flu Shot

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Couple on Wedding DayA recent statistic offers that engaged couples spend an average of 250 hours in a year planning their upcoming wedding. However, on average, today’s couples spend only two hours in that same year planning toward a lifelong marriage relationship.

Statistics say that the right kind of training and premarital encouragement can increase a couple’s likelihood of having a successful marriage by as much as 75%.

To give that a little context: that flu shot you got? 62% effective at preventing the flu.

Couples coaching? 75% effective. Click here to read more.

Why We Lie: Dishonesty in Marriage

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Dishonesty between partners is often a source of difficulty within a marriage. But, I don’t view dishonesty as necessarily an unwillingness to be honest. The majority of us don’t typically enter into relationships intending to lie to our spouse. At some point or another, though, we do.

Maybe it’s a white lie about liking his favorite suit or her “signature dish,” even though you can’t stand it. Maybe it’s an omission to avoid an argument about how much money you actually spent on a tech gadget or a new handbag. No matter the issue or severity of the lie, dishonesty often emerges within our relationships, even with the best of intentions.

So why is “just be honest with each other” so hard? Click here to read more.

Marital Troubles Now May Mean Troubles for Your Kids Later

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marriage trouble impact on kidsAddressing marital discord and enhancing conflict resolution and communication skills are crucial for sustaining and protecting any relationship (and satisfaction with the relationship) over the long term.

This attention is particularly warranted for couples with children, as links between marital conflict and child adjustment problems are well established. Marital discord has been shown to negatively impact cognitive, social, academic, and even psychobiological functioning in children. However,  it’s not clear why, how or when these negative effects take hold. Read More…

Change Thyself

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couple exchanging wedding ringsResearch shows that divorced people who let go of the past and reflect on improving oneself in a relationship are twice as likely to succeed in a future relationship compared to those who don’t. Could making yourself a better partner within your first marriage prevent the second? Read More…